l'atelier

This was so hilarious to me that it brought me to tears. It is yet another example of the client-designer relationship gone amok.

The original post came from 27b/6 (aka David Thorne). The images are linked directly from his website (in the UK) and they may take awhile to load. Be patient. It’s worth the wait.

© 2010, David Thorne.

I am extremely emotional over this and was up all night in tears

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.15am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Poster

Hi

I opened the screen door yesterday and my cat got out and has been missing since then so I was wondering if you are not to busy you could make a poster for me. It has to be A4 and I will photocopy it and put it around my suburb this afternoon.

This is the only photo of her I have she answers to the name Missy and is black and white and about 8 months old. missing on Harper street and my phone number.

Thanks Shan.

 

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From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.26am

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Poster


Dear Shannon,

That is shocking news. Luckily I was sitting down when I read your email and not half way up a ladder or tree. How are you holding up? I am surprised you managed to attend work at all what with thinking about Missy out there cold, frightened and alone… possibly lying on the side of the road, her back legs squashed by a vehicle, calling out "Shannon, where are you?"

Although I have two clients expecting completed work this afternoon, I will, of course, drop everything and do whatever it takes to facilitate the speedy return of Missy.

Regards, David.

 

•••

 

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.37am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Poster


yeah ok thanks. I know you dont like cats but I am really worried about mine. I have to leave at 1pm today.

 

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From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.17am

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Poster


Dear Shannon,

I never said I don’t like cats. Once, having been invited to a party, I went clothes shopping beforehand and bought a pair of expensive G-Star boots. They were two sizes too small but I wanted them so badly I figured I could just wear them without socks and cut my toenails very short. As the party was only a few blocks from my place, I decided to walk. After the first block, I lost all feeling in my feet. Arriving at the party, I stumbled into a guy named Steven, spilling Malibu & coke onto his white Wham ‘Choose Life’ t-shirt, and he punched me. An hour or so after the incident, Steven sat down in a chair already occupied by a cat. The surprised cat clawed and snarled causing Steven to leap out of the chair, slip on a rug and strike his forehead onto the corner of a speaker; resulting in a two inch open gash. In its shock, the cat also defecated, leaving Steven with a wet brown stain down the back of his beige cargo pants. I liked that cat.

Attached poster as requested.

Regards, David.

 

•••

 

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.24am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster


yeah thats not what I was looking for at all. it looks like a movie and how come the photo of Missy is so small?

 

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From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.28am

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster


Dear Shannon,

It’s a design thing. The cat is lost in the negative space.

Regards, David.

 

•••

 

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.33am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster



Thats just stupid. Can you do it properly please? I am extremely emotional over this and was up all night in tears. you seem to think it is funny. Can you make the photo bigger please and fix the text and do it in colour please. Thanks.

 

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From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.46am

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster


Dear Shannon,

Having worked with designers for a few years now, I would have assumed you understood, despite our vague suggestions otherwise, we do not welcome constructive criticism. I don’t come downstairs and tell you how to send text messages, log onto Facebook and look out of the window. I am willing to overlook this faux pas due to you no doubt being preoccupied with thoughts of Missy attempting to make her way home across busy intersections or being trapped in a drain as it slowly fills with water. I spent three days down a well once but that was just for fun.

I have amended and attached the poster as per your instructions.

Regards, David.

 

•••

 

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.59am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster


This is worse than the other one. can you make it so it shows the whole photo of Missy and delete the stupid text that says missing missy off it? I just want it to say lost.

 

•••

 

From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.14am

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

 

•••

 

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.21am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster


yeah can you do the poster or not? I just want a photo and the word lost and the telephone number and when and where she was lost and her name. Not like a movie poster or anything stupid. I have to leave early today. If it was your cat I would help you. Thanks.

 

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From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.32am

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Awww


Dear Shannon,

I don’t have a cat. I once agreed to look after a friend’s cat for a week but after he dropped it off at my apartment and explained the concept of kitty litter, I kept the cat in a closed cardboard box in the shed and forgot about it. If I wanted to feed something and clean faeces, I wouldn’t have put my mother in that home after her stroke. A week later, when my friend came to collect his cat, I pretended that I was not home and mailed the box to him. Apparently I failed to put enough stamps on the package and he had to collect it from the post office and pay eighteen dollars. He still goes on about that sometimes, people need to learn to let go.

I have attached the amended version of your poster as per your detailed instructions.

Regards, David.

 

•••

 

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.47am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Awww


Thats not my cat. where did you get that picture from? That cat is orange. I gave you a photo of my cat.

 

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From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.58am

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Re: Awww


I know, but that one is cute. As Missy has quite possibly met any one of several violent ends, it is possible you might get a better cat out of this. If anybody calls and says "I haven’t seen your orange cat but I did find a black and white one with its hind legs run over by a car, do you want it?" you can politely decline and save yourself a costly veterinarian bill.

I knew someone who had a basset hound that had its hind legs removed after an accident and it had to walk around with one of those little buggies with wheels. If it had been my dog I would have asked for all its legs to be removed and replaced with wheels and had a remote control installed. I could charge neighbourhood kids for rides and enter it in races. If I did the same with a horse I could drive it to work. I would call it Steven.

Regards, David.

 

•••

 

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.07pm

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Awww


Please just use the photo I gave you.

 

•••

 

From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.22pm

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

 

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From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.34pm

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww



I didnt say there was a reward. I dont have $2000 dollars. What did you even put that there for? Apart from that it is perfect can you please remove the reward bit. Thanks Shan.

 

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From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.42pm

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

 

•••

 

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.51pm

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww



Can you just please take the reward bit off altogether? have to leave in ten minutes and I still have to make photocopies of it.

 

•••

 

From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.56pm

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

 

•••

 

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 1.03pm

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww


Fine. That will have to do.

 

•••

 

The technique of making a custom border in Illustrator is similar to specifying a pattern. View the example starting motif and the finished border.

Start with a linear pattern that you wish to repeat seamlessly. I found this albatross motif which I (hand) traced in Illustrator.

And generated at least one instance of a seamless repeat by copying and pasting and filling in the missing segment.

First, make sure all of the elements of the motif are grouped together: Select > All and then Object > Group

This will also place all of the objects on the same layer.

Make sure the rulers are visible: View > Show Rulers

Find the edges of the repeat and drag guide lines from the vertical ruler to align with each of the edges. Try to be precise so there are no gaps or overlaps in the repeated design.

Make sure the guides are locked: View > Guides > Lock Guides. Make sure there is a check mark next to Lock Guides. Click to toggle the lock on or off.

With the Rectangle Tool (1), draw a box with no fill and no border (2) that completely encompasses the area to be repeated.

Select All again and choose Crop (1) from the Pathfinder panel (2).

This should result in a single instance of the repeat.

Note: If the original design includes complex appearances or blends, you may have to expand the appearances (Object > Expand Appearance) or expand strokes and fills (Object > Expand…) before cropping.

Select All again and open the Brushes panel (1). Make a new brush (2) and select New Pattern Brush (3):

Frm the Pattern Brush Options dialogue box, name the brush (1) and click on the Side Tile indicator (2) and click OK:

To test the repeat, use the Pen Tool (1) to draw a straight line (2):

Select the line. From the Brushes Panel (1), choose the new custom brush (2):

To change the size of the border, first select Object > Transform > Scale…

From the Scale dialogue box, make sure Scale Stroke & Effects is checked:

With the line segment selected and holding down the Shift ket, pull the upper corner handles out:

The next series of vector reproductions is from Eugene Grasset’s Plants and Their Application to Ornament A Nineteenth-Century Design Primer which was published in 1897. Somewhat earlier than Christopher Dresser, Grasset was more of a contemporary of William Morris, Eugene Grasset was more famous in his time as a designer of French-style posters and magazine cover designs.

Plants and Their Application to Ornament begins with a study of one of the garden plants from which stylized design variations are generated. His designs are generally Art Nouveau or Art and Crafts style and quite archetypical of the period. Some are representational of how these designs would be applied as decoration to different media (wallpaper, fabric, tiles, stained glass, carved wood, metal,porcelain) or as decorative patterns, borders, and motifs. They betray his background as a decorative materials designer before turning to illustration.

All of the original plates were reproduced by a pochoir (literally ‘stencil’) print process, which was a precursor of silk screen printing. The originals are very graphic and lend themselves to vector illustration. As such, they can be used in period reproduction or adapted for contemporary design elements.

Below is the first in an ambitious series. The collection will eventually grow to include design variations for 33 garden plants. View completed plates here.